When it just doesn't work

Wednesday's run was a really crappy run for me.

I went into the group run already thinking that I wouldn't do my tempo portion even though it was scheduled (and I'm pretty big on keeping to the schedule). I figured that I could do the run as easy and get the tempo in on Thursday or Saturday. I was so tired as my youngest son has been walking up throughout the night again and is up for the day around 4am (He was awake today, Friday, from 3-6 and then fell back asleep leaning against me on the couch. Yawn). I was not enthusiastic at all about running.

When we started the run, I ended up alone (again - that's what SUCKS about a small group - no one is at my pace) and I had quite the internal discussion going on about running the tempo versus saving it for later in the week (saving it! HA! Like its a treat or something!). The store manager who is running with our group doubled back from the front pack and we talked for a bit about it and while he didn't say anything one way or another, he pretty much agreed that if I was feeling okay, I should probably just get it done.

At 15 minutes into the run, I hit lap on my Garmin and picked up the pace to my McMillan target of 5:25/km (Running Room has me doing tempo at 5:44/km and has me racing at 5:42/km - that just seems wrong to me, thus McMillan who agrees that my Mpace should be 5:42 to achieve a 4 hour marathon). I felt pretty good for the first 10 minutes. I was alone (boo), but managing my internal chatter to keep motivated (the usual - "you can do anything for 20 minutes." "do you think running a MARATHON will be easy?" "Suck it up, macnic"). The sidewalks were icy in parts so that slowed me down and made the run a bit harder I think. I did manage a thankful thought as I ran by my childhood Church (where I was married) and thought about how lucky I was to even be out and running.

But then... then...

My tired body and legs just caught up to me. I had caught up to the speedy runners in the group and passed them as they were done their tempo and just... crashed and burned. I hit lap at 15:56 into my tempo portion and walked for a full minute. The speedy group passed me. I caught them again at a light and said I was sticking with them now (YAY! Friends!) and managed to run another 4km with them at a punishing 5:52/km average pace.

When I finished I just felt like crap.

Ya, I did the (almost) 10k and I pretty much did a the entire tempo run, but it just felt like crap. There was no fun in the run.

Thank goodness I know that this does happen from time to time and my next run will be better (and it was).

What do you do when you're in the middle of the run and you realize that its just not working?

(no title)

I had a hard time coming up with a title for this post. I didn’t want to fall into the old trap of writing, “Finally” or “I’m back” or “It’s been a while” or anything like that. Suffice to say I haven’t blogged in a while.

This means I haven’t run in a while.

In fact, I have not run since October 31st.

And that one was a shitty 7k in HIGH. SPEED. WIND. WARNINGS. With Sarah.

I took a week off due to illness and then, I took a week off due to lethargy.

Yep.

Good ole, “I don’t give a flying fuck right now so I’m going to sit on my couch with booze in my flannel PJs and watch reality TV” (everyone has these weeks right?).

So.

That pity party ended on Sunday when I took my willpower and vitality back (you go girl) and decided that it was time to hop back on the treadmill/paths.

Yesterday I worked from home and after a look at the sun shining outside and a peek at the Weather Network, I decided to power up the treadmill and step on it for 50 minutes (I know! The real runners who are reading are groaning at the fact that I turned down a perfect, sunny, fall day of outdoor running to enjoy the drudgery of the basement treadmill. But, I watched the Tyra Banks show while running – surely that makes up for something). The first 25 minutes flew by (and trust me, Tyra was not that exciting). I clearly remember thinking, “Wow! I didn’t loose as much as I thought." I got through the next 25 minutes pulling 8 and 1s, keeping my pace a steady 5.4. I ended up running 6.92km and am very happy.

I shall run again tomorrow night.

Except this time I will have Jeff Probst to keep me company.

Endurance

I have lost quite a bit.

I ran 8.3km this windy, cold Sunday morning with Sarah and I sucked it! It was the first time I had run in 8 days (ran 8k with Sarah last Saturday). This week was just horrible. It was filled with lethargy and drinking.

(Quick aside: I'm trying to have kid #2. I have been for a while - not a long time in the grand scheme of things, but long enough. I thought this was the month. It turned out not to be and well all motivation turned to lethargy. Boo hoo. I'm not here to write about that stuff though and so, on to running).

The drinking was fun. The lethargy was paid for today.

I'm not sure how I'm going to get through the zoo 10k next Saturday or what my plan is. I WILL run it, that goes without saying of course. It'll be the first time I run 10k. Ever. I'll guess I'll set goals along the lines of finishing and not dying! HA!

So, I've had enough of feeling sorry for myself and am now back to running and writing about it. And reading about people who do the very same thing.

Motiva-what?

Sigh. Lately motivation has waxed and waned. It just seems so much easier to allow life to get in the way. Like yummy Indian dinners out with my husband followed by newly discovered cider.

However, I’ve signed up for the Toronto Women’s 5K race and my aim is to PB this run at a sub 30 minute time, officially – natch.

So, that means I’m going to have to get off of my butt.

Train (if you will).

Set a schedule for runs.

This is my plan:

One weeknight run (about all I typically fit in). This must be 5-7k

One weekend run (again, typical). The goal for this should be 10k (har, NOT typical)

One morning run on the treadmill (30 minutes of the hill program). This is net new. This can be done on Tuesday’s or Thursday’s when I don’t have to take my kid to my parents house for care.

Curves visits 2-3x a week (I’m a wee bit over Curves)

Baseball as scheduled

This is the two week plan. Revisions to come July 30th.

I will keep you updated.

I will follow it.

I will PB.

Week of March 9th

Bad week:

Ran once, inside
Didn't drink enough water
Random drinks
Random eating
No blogging

Good week:

Went to Podiatrist, go new Orthotics on the way
Went to Curves three times
Spent time with a great friend at the Raptors game
Came up with an idea for a cerebral post (I'm on a break from my chat boards - the original "social network", with Facebook and Twitter, is there value in me returning? - stay tuned and I'll try to bang it out this week)
Weighed in at 152 lbs.
Officially signed up for Bioval "Hazel" 5k race in May.

Feb 3/09

I’ve decided to really run with this running thing! HA! I’ve set a goal for myself for the month and the year and I really hope to meet it. I am also going to look into some 5k races, but likely not any learn to run program as my fitness fees are maxed for the year with my Curves membership. You will be able to track my progress by my tickers which are now included in the header.

B: Banana
Ex: Curves – have I ever mentioned that when I go to Curves in the AM, it means that I’m up by 5:30 (I am actually up every day at this time) and out the door by 6:00 to get to the gym by 7:30? This is why I always have B#2 on those days.
B#2: All Bran buds with yogurt and coffee
L: Pork sandwich on whole wheat
S: Apple
D: Sheppard’s Pie
S: Nibs, peanuts
H20: Over 2L

So I started the All Bran Bud challenge. Basically you are supposed to eat 1/3 cup every day for two weeks and it’ll help you to become “regular”. I mix them with yogurt or other cereal. I don’t think I get enough fibre in my diet so I’m adding these to help me in that department. I’ll report back on how I feel in two weeks.

And yes, I suck. I snacked at night again. I’m having a VERY meh week I guess.